May 15, 20247 min read

A music illiterate reviews Eurovision Part 1

This past weekend saw millions tune in around the world to watch the 2024 Eurovision final hosted in Malmo Sweden. Known for its diverse musical genres, spectacular performances, and the unique opportunity to showcase national cultures, Eurovision captivates millions of viewers worldwide. This year's entries are no exception, featuring everything from pop and rock to folk and opera, each aiming to capture the hearts of both the professional juries and the voting public. But no one has heard the opinion of someone that knows nothing about music, so clearly that is what’s needed! Join us for A Music Idiots Review of Eurovision!

37 Countries competed in this year's Eurovision across the Semi Finals and the Final itself, which means we have 37 songs to review!

Iceland “Scared of Heights” By Hera Bjork

Starting off with Iceland, they have had a notable presence in the Eurovision Song Contest since their debut in 1986. Though it has yet to win the competition, failing to make it out of the semi-finals this year, was this perhaps a hidden gem among the songs this year?

Scared of Heights must be quite fortunate for Hera as the song did not reach the dizzying heights of the semi final scoreboard only receiving 3 points, which arguably is 3 too many. This song certainly is one of the songs of all time, in fact it's so striking in its blandness and lack of uniqueness that we come to expect from Eurovision songs that it unfortunately reminds me of “Embers”. Sorry Iceland, but I have to give you nil pois for this one.

Azerbaijan "Özünlə apar" by FAHREE feat. Ilkin Dovlatov

Since debuting in 2008, Azerbaijan has quickly established itself as a powerhouse in the Eurovision Song Contest, highlighted by its win in 2011 with "Running Scared" by Ell & Nikki. With a reputation for high-quality performances and frequent top 10 finishes, Azerbaijan continues to be a formidable and dynamic competitor in Eurovision. This year they were represented by FAHREE and Ilkin Dovlatov with their song "Özünlə apar". Despite historically doing well at Eurovision this only only netted them 11 points in the semi finals. But was this a justified 14th place finish at the semis? Honestly, I kind of like the song, it has a great sound to it and the singing is only adds to it but yet its missing something. Whilst the song has good vocals and seemed to be a decent representation of Mugham music, it lacked a lot of character we tend to expect from Azerbaijan and their performances. Speaking of, the performance they did required you to have seen the music video to “understand” it, which does not usually make for an entertaining viewing experience when you need to have extracurricular viewing requirements. In the end, it’s a decent song just not the best representation we’ve had out of the country, finishing 14th in the semi final was probably fair.

Moldova “In The Middle” Natalia Barbu

Since their debut in 2005, Moldova has made a significant impact on the Eurovision Song Contest with a mix of quirky and memorable performances. Highlighted by a 3rd place finish in 2017 with SunStroke Project's "Hey Mamma," Moldova continues to be a favourite for its unique and entertaining contributions to the contest. But what was this year's entry like?

I think this might be the first song where my opinion differs from the results and I guess the rest of Europe. Natalia Barbu has beautiful vocals on this song, with her voice being the main focal point of the song carrying the bridge into the chorus which switches into her native language from English and even goes into a violin solo. This song is what many of us expect to hear when we think of Eurovision. The fact this song only barely finished above the previous 2 songs is criminal. It definitely deserved to finish higher, maybe even challenging for a final spot.

Poland “The Tower” by Luna

Debuting in 1994, Poland has participated in the Eurovision Song Contest with a wide range of musical styles and culturally infused performances. Despite not securing a win, Poland has achieved notable successes, particularly with Edyta Górniak's 2nd place in their debut year and other memorable entries like Donatan & Cleo's "My Słowianie" and Michał Szpak's "Color of Your Life." But enough about the past, what was this year’s song and performance like? Well considering it finished above Moldova it has to be good right?!?! WRONG. I like synth-pop, a few of my favourite songs of all time are synth songs. But this is one of the dullest synth pop songs I’ve heard. Not to mention the vocal performance itself isn't anything special, sure Luna can sing but it's not blowing anyone away. The stage performance was interesting with her performing on a chess board with 2 rook pieces, it was an entertaining performance and definitely deserves praise from that perspective. However I do think it finished around where it should have. 12th in the semi final is a good spot for it. It’s getting a 4.

Australia “One Milkali (One Blood)” by Electric Fields

A much more recent addition to Eurovision, Australia first appeared in 2015 and since making significant impact with strong entries and memorable performances. Highlighted by Dami Im's 2nd place finish in 2016 with "Sound of Silence," Australia has consistently delivered high-quality performances that blend powerful vocals, creative staging, and contemporary pop appeal. Australia's participation adds a unique and diverse dimension to the contest, further broadening Eurovision's global reach. However the reach wasn’t global enough this year as they failed to make it out of the semi final stage. Was this deserved? Well the song they performed wasn’t the worst song from Eurovision, and if there's anything Australia has proven its that they “get” eurovision. I personally liked the song and how they incorporated Aboriginal lyrics and instruments into the song. It had a fun and catchy house beat with a strong vocal performance to go along with it. Whilst failing to make it through to the semi’s, I don’t think Australia should be ashamed of their performance. A solid song, I’m giving it a 6.5/10 on my totally not arbitrary made up scoring system that's totally objective and not subjective.

Malta “Loop” by Sarah Bonnici

Malta has established itself as a formidable contender in the Eurovision Song Contest. The country has achieved notable success, particularly with Ira Losco's "7th Wonder" in 2002 and Chiara's "Angel" in 2005, both of which secured 2nd place finishes. Malta is celebrated for its strong vocal performances and polished pop songs. Despite not having secured a win yet, Malta continues to be a competitive and respected participant, consistently delivering engaging and high-quality entries that captivate audiences and showcase contemporary music blended with captivating stage presentations. Despite good history in the competition, I don't think this song was particularly anything special, whilst it had a fun live dance performance and Sarah has a great voice, I personally didn’t think it was anything special overall nor thought that it was Eurovision enough to deserve to go beyond the semi finals, which turns out others agreed with as it finished bottom of its semi final grouping. Not a bad song, just not very Eurovision or inspired. 4/10

Albania “Titan” Besa

Albania has consistently participated in the Eurovision Song Contest, earning respect for its strong vocal performances and culturally rich entries. Highlighted by Rona Nishliu's 5th place finish in 2012 with "Suus," Albania has made a significant impact with its blend of powerful ballads, rock influences, and cultural authenticity. This year they were represented by Besa with the ballad “Titan” and failed to make it past the Semi Final. But was this what the song deserved? Yeah probably, whilst I personally am a sucker for ballads, this one wasn’t the more inspiring. Vocal ballads rely heavily on vocal performance and whilst Besa has beautiful voice, the performance didn’t live up to the height required for a ballad to do well at Eurovision. 5/10

Belgium “Before The Party Is Over” Mustii

Belgium has made a significant impact on the Eurovision Song Contest with a variety of musical styles and memorable performances. This year they were represented by Mustii with the song “Before The Party Is Over”. The on stage performance featured Mustii performing whilst surrounded by a circle of microphones, which helped provide a memorable and unique visual. The song itself was described by Mustii as “pop with a dark edge” and honestly I sort of can see that, its very much similar to other pop ballads but Mustii’s voice is the main focus of the song and helps elevate it to the next level. The song build and builds as it slowly reaches a crescendo as it reaches its truly epic scale. This song is a hidden gem among the songs that failed to get past the semi final. It’s actually a crime that it did not make it through to the final. 7/10

Denmark “Sand” Saba

Denmark has established itself as a formidable and respected presence in the Eurovision Song Contest, known for its high-quality entries and diverse musical styles. The country has achieved three notable victories: in 1963 with Grethe & Jørgen Ingmann's melodic "Dansevise," in 2000 with the Olsen Brothers' catchy "Fly on the Wings of Love," and in 2013 with Emmelie de Forest's powerful "Only Teardrops." But does “Sand” by Saba live up to this legacy? Well sort of? The song itself is a catchy vocal pop ballad that gets to show off Saba’s talent and skill however the song itself didn’t make it out of the semi finals and I honestly can understand why. However I don’t think this song should have finished above Belgium and I understand why this one couldn’t break it out of the Semi Finals. 5.5/10

Czechia “Pedestal” Aiko

Czechia, also known as the Czech Republic, has been making its mark on the Eurovision Song Contest with a series of notable performances and increasing success since its debut in 2007. After initial challenges, including non-qualification in its first three attempts, Czechia's perseverance paid off with Mikolas Josef's energetic "Lie to Me" in 2018, which finished in 6th place, marking the country’s best result to date.

This year they submitted the pop-punk song “Pedestal” by Aiko. This song seems to be a lot like marmite for a lot of people with some thinking that it deserved to make it into the final and others thinking that it did well to almost qualify but just missed out. Personally I think it's a fine song, but I don't think the final was missing the song, I’ll give a 5/10.

TikTok ban: An Act of Market Control, Not Freedom

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15 January 2025

Connor Banks

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The Supreme Court of the United States met on Friday the 10th of January to discuss the imminent TikTok ban in the United States, and it's looking like the Supreme Court is going to uphold the ban. This means that TikTok will have to be sold off to an American company or be banned from America.

Facebook and Tiktok fighting each other. Felt design

The United States has long prided itself on being a champion of innovation and free-market competition. Yet, the recent push to ban TikTok exposes a different reality. While the ban is often framed as a measure to protect American "freedoms," closer scrutiny reveals that the motivations behind it are less about safeguarding national security or personal liberty and more about protecting the dominance of American tech giants who have failed to create a competing product.

The National Security Argument: A Convenient Scapegoat

The primary justification for the TikTok ban centres on national security concerns. Critics argue that TikTok’s ownership by a Chinese company poses risks of data misuse or surveillance by the Chinese government. While these concerns warrant investigation, the evidence presented so far has been largely speculative. Moreover, TikTok has taken significant steps to address these concerns, such as pledging to store U.S. user data domestically and offering unprecedented transparency in its operations.

In contrast, American tech companies, including Facebook and Google, have faced numerous scandals over data breaches and misuse, yet these incidents rarely spark discussions of bans. This double standard suggests that the TikTok ban isn’t truly about protecting users’ data but about something far more self-serving: market control.

A Failure to Innovate: American Companies’ Struggle to Compete

TikTok’s meteoric rise exposed a glaring weakness in American tech innovation. Despite their immense resources and influence, companies like Meta (formerly Facebook), Google, and Snapchat have failed to develop a platform that resonates with younger audiences in the same way TikTok does. Meta’s Instagram Reels and YouTube Shorts, both designed to mimic TikTok’s short-form video format, have not captured the same cultural zeitgeist or user engagement.

Rather than innovating, these companies have leaned heavily on their lobbying power to stifle competition. The push to ban TikTok can be seen as an attempt to remove a superior competitor from the market, allowing American platforms to reclaim dominance without addressing their own shortcomings. This approach not only stifles competition but also sets a dangerous precedent for using regulatory measures to quash innovative foreign products rather than improving domestic ones.

The Hypocrisy of “Freedom”

American lawmakers have framed the TikTok ban as a measure to protect citizens' freedoms, yet the ban itself directly contradicts the principles of choice and access that underpin those freedoms. TikTok’s success is driven by millions of Americans who have chosen to use the app, finding value in its unique algorithm, diverse content, and engaging user experience. Restricting access to the platform undermines these users’ autonomy, suggesting that their freedoms are secondary to corporate interests.

Furthermore, the United States’ tech landscape is already dominated by monopolies. Companies like Meta, Google, and Amazon control vast swaths of the internet, often using their market power to squash smaller competitors. The TikTok ban does not address this monopolistic behaviour; instead, it reinforces it by eliminating a rare instance of genuine competition in the social media space.

A Global Perspective: The Irony of “Protection”

The ban also highlights a broader irony. For years, American tech companies have championed global free markets, often entering foreign countries and out-competing local businesses. Yet when faced with competition from a foreign company on their own turf, the response has been to cry foul rather than adapt.

This hypocrisy weakens America’s global standing as a proponent of innovation and fair competition. Instead of banning TikTok, the United States could use this moment to examine why its own companies failed to create a comparable product and what can be done to foster domestic innovation.

The Real Solution: Compete, Don’t Constrain

If the goal is to protect American freedoms and ensure data security, a TikTok ban is a shortsighted solution. Instead, lawmakers should focus on regulating data privacy across all platforms, domestic and foreign, to ensure robust protections for users. Simultaneously, the tech industry should be incentivised to innovate rather than rely on protectionist policies.

TikTok’s popularity is a testament to its ability to connect with users in ways that American platforms have failed to replicate. Banning the app does not solve this problem; it simply papers over it. To truly champion freedom, the United States must allow competition to flourish, even when it means facing uncomfortable truths about its own shortcomings.

The push to ban TikTok is less about protecting American freedoms and more about protecting American monopolies. Framed as a national security issue, the campaign against TikTok is ultimately an admission that American tech giants have failed to keep up with their global counterparts. If the U.S. truly values innovation and freedom, it must resist the urge to eliminate competition through regulation and instead focus on fostering a market where the best product, not the most powerful company, wins.